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Sunday, September 13, 2009

CAUTION: Keep Bags Away From Me!

On my way out the door with Bear to let him take a shit crap poop dump, I grabbed the community dog feces bag from a drawer by the door, but I instantly discovered it had been smellified by the ones shown above.

For some reason, the smells most people seem to find attractive I find gross and horrid. These bags, for example, have a scent that to my nose is a cross between cigarette smoke and cheap perfume. WHY? I ask you ...

That reminds me of the STINKY aisle in the supermarket, where I have to hold my breath as I pass the candle section. And the "craft" store, where they have mingled odors that give my sinuses the feeling of having a metal knitting needle poked up into them.

The odors that are pictured in stink-removal advertising are not nearly as offensive to me as the artificial ones they put in the stinky air "fresheners". Onions? Bring em on. Fish? yum! Cabbage? Mmmmmmmmmm. Wet dog? OH he will dry. Artificial strawberry? OMG LEMME OUTA HERE!

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